Perhaps the most important thing about being a good server, other than not letting your customers know you are completely dead inside, is making sure they get the food they
actually ordered. If someone asks for grilled salmon with couscous and you bring them a rare hamburger with blue cheese instead, they might notice. If they’re like me, they will eat it anyway for fear of pissing off the server who might then never fill the water again and touch the bread with their hands. We must take the order carefully.
Develop A System
You need to know who ordered what so you don’t have to “auction off” the food. Nothing says unprofessionalism like holding an organic, grass-fed steak and repeatedly asking who wants it. Besides, we all know that customers have the short-term memory of a mentally challenged squirrel monkey and they won’t remember what they ordered anyway. Use seat numbers. For instance, when you face the table, the person to your left would be position number one, the person to their left would be position number two, and so on. This will allow you to remember who gets what. That is, unless the customers decide to play a game of musical chairs while you’re in the kitchen, in which case, you will end up auctioning off the food anyway. And you can call me old-fashioned (or just make me one that I can put in a coffee cup), but ask the women first what they will be having. Some people may see this as a relic of days gone by, but I see it as a product of growing up in the south and having good manners. No one will be offended by this except possibly a very cranky old man who feels his blood sugar level is dramatically dropping and is in desperate need of a roll.
Know Your Menu
Inevitably, someone who is allergic to mushrooms is going to ask you if there are mushrooms in
the mushroom frittata. After you roll your eyes so hard that you clearly see the inside of your
own skull, you want to be able to confidently answer the question. (Correct response: “Yes, there are mushrooms in the mushroom frittata.” Incorrect response: “It says it right there in the menu! Oh, my god, I hate you so much!”) Not knowing the answer to a question about the menu is only going to make it take longer to get the order. And the longer it takes to get the order, the longer it will take for these customers to get out of your life forever. Unless they’re your regulars, of course. We like them.
Write It Down
You may have the ability to remember that a two-top both ordered fish tacos, but if they don’t see you put it down on paper, they will spend the next fifteen minutes worried that you are an idiot who will bring them spaghetti and meatballs instead. For their peace of mind, write it down and then reread it to them. Writing it down and confirming their order will come in handy later when someone claims that what you brought them isn’t what they ordered. That’s when you can reach into your apron, pull out your order pad and let them know you are right, in the nicest way possible.
Taking the order is our first chance to show the customer that we are in charge and we know what we are doing. Do it right and the customer will follow your lead for the rest of their time with you. Do it wrong and you will expose the chink in your armor that could lead to a bad Yelp review or worse, a bad tip.